Kwentong Kengkay

Marso 14, 2009

biyaheng pinoy opisyal

Filed under: Pasaway,Patawa,Pinas — kengkay @ 2:44 hapon
Nakiliti ako dito sa forwarded message na ito. Parang tunay pero hindi ko alam kung totoo.
Kung joke man ito, parang hindi, hahahaha. Ganito na ba katanga ang mga taong asa gobyerno o nagpapakatanga lang sila? Basahin.
Eto na sya:

A friend has been a Travel Agent for 30 Years. She says her 30 years of taking reservation requests from government officials explains why we are all in trouble.

Here’s a few choice reservation questions from these bright people:

1) Senator Tessie Oreta asked for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn’t  get messed up by being near the window.
2) I got a call from ex-Mayor Joey Marquez, who wanted to go to Capetown. Explaining the length of the flight and passport information, he interrupted me with, ‘I’m not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts. ‘ Without trying to make him look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, ‘Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa.’ His response ..(click).

3) Congressman Mark Lapid called, furious about a Florida package we did for him and tv star Kris Aquino. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that was not possible since Orlando is in the  middle of the state. He replied, ‘Don’t lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!’ (so he expected to see the ocean on both sides of the hotel?!)
4) Sen Ralph Recto’s wife (actress Vilma Santos) asked, ‘Is it possible to see England from Canada?’ I said, ‘No.’ She said, ‘But they look so close on the map.’

5) Senator Lito Lapid asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. I noticed he had only an hour lay-over in Dallas.. When asked why he wanted to rent a car, he said, ‘I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between the gates to save time.’

6) Senator Jinggoy Estrada (son of Erap) called last week. He needed to know how it was possible that his flight from Detroit left at 8:20 a.m. and got into Chicago at 8:33 a.m. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but he could not understand the concept of time zones.  Finally, I told him the plane went very fast, and he bought that!
7) Congressman Ronaldo Zamora asked, ‘Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?’ I said, ‘No, why do you ask?’ He replied, ‘Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I’m overweight. I think that is very rude!’ I looked into it and explained the city code for Fresno, California is (FAT), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on his luggage.
8) Former presidential candidate, now tv star Eddie Gil inquired about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, he asked, ‘Would it be cheaper to fly to California and take the train to Hawaii?’

9) I just got off the phone with Senator Bong Revilla who asked, ‘How do I know which plane to get on?’ Iasked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ‘I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them.’

10) VP Noli De Castro asked, ‘I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, FL. Do I have to get on one of those twin engine planes?’ I asked if he meant fly to Pensacola, FL on a commuter plane. He said, ‘Yeah, whate ver!’
11) Congressman Dilangalen called and had a question about the documents needed to fly to China. I reminded him he needed a visa. ‘Oh, no I don’t. I’ve been to China many times and never had to have one of those.’ I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this, he said, ‘Look, I’ve been to China four times and everytime they accepted my American Express!’
12) Senator Miriam Defensor called to make reservations, ‘I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York.’ The agent said, ‘Are you sure that’s the name of the town?’ ‘Yes, what flights do you have?’ replied the lady.  After some searching, the agent came back with, ‘I’m sorry, ma’am, I’ve looked up every airport code in the country and can’t find a Rhino anywhere.’ The lady retorted, ‘Oh, don’t be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!’ The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, ‘You don’t mean Buffalo, do you?’ ‘That’s it! I knew it was a big animal,’ she said.
Now you know why Government is in the shape that it’s in.’

Ano sa tingin ninyo? Tunay nga kaya? Kawawa naman tayo, huhuhuh


28 mga puna »

  1. kung tunay to lagot na =P
    tsktsk magiging katatawanan ang gobyerno non..


    ate kengks,
    parelink nga pala po
    hehe nagWP nako!!:))

    pero ung site wala pang laman
    toinkz.. bsta parelink


    kengkay: sige update ko link mo

    Komento ni nadine — Marso 14, 2009 @ 3:02 hapon | Sagutin

  2. hahahaha! ano sa tingin mo totoo? hindi malayo really. hay….

    matagal na tayong kawawa 😦

    kengkay: ano nga kaya ano?

    Komento ni annevdns — Marso 14, 2009 @ 4:22 hapon | Sagutin

  3. sa tingin ko joke lang yan o kung totoo man hindi naman laging nasasalamin sa ganyan lang ang mukha ng Pilipinas. sobra naman ang gumawa nyan!

    kengkay: ahahaha, ano nga kaya, hmmm

    Komento ni dencios — Marso 14, 2009 @ 5:54 hapon | Sagutin

  4. muka ngang totoo mami kengks. detalyado eh.

    it is true that we cannot blame these government officials’ actions for the dismal state of our country but we can’t also take away the fact that there are some people who are meant to clearly entertain and not dabble on public service works. yes, i’m talking about lito lapid and all the sonuvabitches and bastards hopping giddily from entertainment to politics with the thickest face to muster.

    kengkay: minsan kasi ang pag showbiz nga lang di pa luto tapos sugod pa sa pulitika

    Komento ni lio loco — Marso 14, 2009 @ 11:29 hapon | Sagutin

  5. sa mga VIP ang alam ko pwedeng staff na nya ang nag-aayos.pwede din tumatagos ‘yun iniisip ng mga personality na ito sa mga staff n’ya o mismong pag-iisip ng staff…(kasing gulo ba ng kanilang byahe ang aking eksplenasyon?!)

    kengkay: parang tama yan

    Komento ni kwentulang marino — Marso 15, 2009 @ 3:43 umaga | Sagutin

  6. usually, staff ang nag-aayos ng flight. baka mga staff yan ng gov’t official. minsan kasi ganyan talaga mga EA (executive asst) nila), kakaloka.

    kengkay: pwedeng nagkahawaan din hehe

    Komento ni nina — Marso 15, 2009 @ 4:27 umaga | Sagutin

  7. 2 lang yan, pede di totoo o kaya ay kwentong barbero lang yan…

    kengkay: ano nga kaya

    Komento ni payatot — Marso 15, 2009 @ 10:30 umaga | Sagutin

  8. Kengs joke are half-meant! Read between the lines…hehehe… ^_^

    kengkay: u know me .haha

    Komento ni Snow — Marso 15, 2009 @ 1:36 hapon | Sagutin

  9. i read this somewhere, pero mga american politicians naman.

    But it perks a joke, lalo na, true na, hindi lahat ng pinoys even the politicians knows all cities in the world…

    GOOD JOKE. Hahaha.

    Ma share nga ke Lolo to, palitan ko lang ng pres of france sarco, or di kaya asawa niya, para may dating, lol.
    Opps, sana wala makabasa na taga france neto, alam nyo na, baka deny cit ako, hahahaha.

    kengkay: gawin mo nga, hehe

    Komento ni francesca in france — Marso 15, 2009 @ 3:42 hapon | Sagutin

  10. me to a friend: oy, bumili ka pala ng celfon, anu yun, yung motolola blade?
    friend: baka razor ibig mo sabihin?
    me: I knew it! it’s something sharp!

    kengkay: panalo, haha

    Komento ni partofyou — Marso 15, 2009 @ 5:50 hapon | Sagutin

  11. hindi…joke yan hahahahahaha!

    Komento ni blurosebluguy — Marso 15, 2009 @ 7:07 hapon | Sagutin

  12. Siguro yung iba joke pero yung iba tingin ko totoo wehehehe.

    kengkay: alin kaya totoo?

    Komento ni joycee — Marso 16, 2009 @ 12:58 umaga | Sagutin

  13. hahaha…nice joke
    may kurot pero totoo

    kengkay: masakit na kurot, hehe

    Komento ni fampings — Marso 16, 2009 @ 1:10 umaga | Sagutin

  14. Iyan ate Kengkay ang tinatawag nilang official travel to Hell hehehehe. Baka ginugood taym lang tayo ng mga nagsulat niyan. I might be wrong. At saka malamit na naman ang buwan ng April.Hindi kaya maagang April fools day iyan, hehehehe.

    kengkay: baka nga ano? hehe

    Komento ni Colegiala girl — Marso 16, 2009 @ 2:15 umaga | Sagutin

  15. hopefully joke lang…


    Komento ni azul — Marso 16, 2009 @ 5:49 umaga | Sagutin

  16. panalo ang banat ni ate V! hahaha

    kengkay: lahat sila winner ;D

    Komento ni vanny — Marso 16, 2009 @ 11:31 umaga | Sagutin

  17. i think these are true stories pero yung characters pinalitan para mas sensational, mas may dating story nya. sobrang coincidence naman na isa lang ang travel agent nilang lahat. i find that hard to believe.

    kengkay: pwede rin, hehe

    Komento ni attyarj — Marso 16, 2009 @ 11:50 umaga | Sagutin

  18. lololol. nakuuuu…. masaklap kung totoo man yan! nakakaawa naman ang mga pinoy..

    i love the Rhino! :D:D:D

    Komento ni Pilar — Marso 16, 2009 @ 12:00 hapon | Sagutin

  19. tsk tsk tsk

    Komento ni lilaybulilay — Marso 16, 2009 @ 1:27 hapon | Sagutin

  20. ang kengkoy (kengkay) nung mga storya lalo na yung pepsi cola natawa ko dun hahaha… comedy mnasyado mga pulitiko hahahah

    Komento ni jasonhamster — Marso 16, 2009 @ 1:44 hapon | Sagutin

  21. Hello Kengkay!

    Ala eh, ano ba yan eh. Yong iba dyan, imbento, yong iba tutuo. Alam naman yata ng karamihan kung kanino yong imbento at kanino yong hindi imbento. Pero sa tutuo lang ha, sa akin lang naman hanu, e hindi nga naman sila taga Isteyts, importante ba talagang malaman ang geography ng Isteyts at Oyropa kung di ka naman doon nakatira? Titingnan mo lang naman yan kung may balak ka talagang pumunta sa lugar. E kung nakalimutan mo nga naman bigla kung ano yong ni-research mo. Kung yong Pinas nga di natin alam lahat ng lugar, Isteyts pa kaya at Oyropa. But it’s good to know the geography of other countries, of course. 🙂

    Have a great week Kengkay!

    Komento ni sofie — Marso 16, 2009 @ 2:33 hapon | Sagutin

  22. wiiiii..joke lan yan momie kengks..

    Komento ni simplefula09 — Marso 17, 2009 @ 1:53 umaga | Sagutin

  23. parang erap jokes lang… 😀

    Komento ni mangbadoy — Marso 17, 2009 @ 6:39 umaga | Sagutin

  24. haha.pinaka funny yung kay miriam.pero matalino sya eh.i doubt kung sinabi nya talaga yan.

    Komento ni flamindevil — Marso 17, 2009 @ 11:37 umaga | Sagutin

  25. nakakaloka hehehe hindi mo talaga alam na kahit mga prominenteng tao o me katungkulan eh may taglay din katangahan. …

    Komento ni empress — Marso 18, 2009 @ 3:35 umaga | Sagutin

  26. nandito na pala ang strawberry jam mo at walis
    kelan mo kunin?

    Komento ni raft3r — Marso 19, 2009 @ 8:35 umaga | Sagutin

  27. i want to go in rheno ney york… whahahaha padaan lang po…

    Komento ni livingstain — Marso 20, 2009 @ 4:03 umaga | Sagutin

  28. an kaya eto hehe…

    Komento ni anakngpating — Marso 20, 2009 @ 12:47 hapon | Sagutin

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